In the late 80s Ray Oldenburg wrote a book called The Great Good Place. In it “great good places” are also referred to as “third places,” creating a trifecta of interactive and social variation. In short, the first place is the home, the second place the workplace, and third places are those that are commonly frequented for community socialization—coffee shops, cafes, bookstores, bars, etc.
With the rise of social media and screen entertainment in general, socializing occurs within the first place more than ever before. Why meet someone at the coffee shop after work when you can game with them, while simultaneously checking up on the rest of your world on the socials? In many cases, work is a first place activity now too, giving more reason to engage in formerly third place activities in the first place. “I’m already here. Why leave?”
Now, this is not a shot at the first place. In fact, much of my writing has been about how the home should always take first priority, including with regard to spreading true goodness in the community. But neglecting outside socialization is detrimental to both an individual’s wellbeing as well as a family’s.
Oldenburg’s reasoning for wanting to reclaim the third place came down to communal cohesiveness and social vitality. The community thrives when its residents physically interact with each other in lively ways. In-person conversations over a cup of coffee with a fellow member of your community strengthens connection, as all senses are actively stimulated at once, something either not occurring or occurring only in synthetic form while interacting on a screen.
Oldenburg also claimed that the genuine utilization of the third place increases the vitality of grassroots democracy. While I won’t necessarily get into democracy itself, I do agree that politics adds another layer to this desire of reclaiming the third place. Much of politics is aesthetics. Human connectivity is also an aesthetic. And bearing witness to a positive and attractive participation of connectivity leads to a desire for more.
Currently, the aesthetics of most third places signal politics of the left. It’s harder to find a coffee shop that doesn’t fly some variation of a social justice flag than one that does. But there’s no sign in these places that says “No MAGA hats allowed.” Perhaps, by frequenting these places in groups, we should provide the temptation for such a sign to be put up, not because of troubled caused but because of fun had. “They’re enjoying life in our coffee house… that can’t be allowed to happen.”
(To be sure, I’m certainly sympathetic to the principle of not going to places that are overt advocates of obscenity. At the height of the drag show plague earlier this year, I drove to a coffee shop to write, saw the groomer flag, and instead of going in, wrote this in the parking lot. Think in terms of groups when weighing this decision.)
With regard to the MAGA hat, this isn’t to say that rightwing meetups in third places require a certain garb, a signifying uniform of sorts. These days you kind of know a person’s political lean based off of normal—or, rather not so normal—appearances, an aesthetic itself. And the more you frequent a place with friends of the same mind, a place that has other regulars, the more known the affiliations of your group becomes.
So just go and hang out and have fun and let the rest work itself out. Reclaim the Third Place. First, because it’s good for you and your community, and second, because your community could use a new aesthetic, creating a feedback loop with the first reason. This loop then has positive effects on both the first place and the second place. And before you know it, the flags in third place windows have changed.
One of my previous job was to create from A to Z a third place dedicated to creativity, technology and crafts. I was expecting a lot of unbearable left-minded people but discovered that something like a third of the users were far more subtle and more "alt-right" oriented.
Because I was myself ok to talk about some topics usually addressed by right-winged people, it created an atmosphere that such people enjoyed. Also, because that kind of atmosphere is rare in the West, it was like a breath of fresh air for everyone.
I didn't end up in something awesome for other reasons but it remains certain that a third place is a very good way to create and strengthen a community with a mindset close to ours.